Last months British Medical Journal reported that the average person’s sex life ends at age 70 (BMJ 2010; 340:c810). Using sophisticated life tables and prevalence data provided by the National Social Life, Health and Aging Project (NSLHAP) the Univ. of Chicago researchers said that by 55 men had an average sexual life expectancy of 15 more years, and women that age could expect only 10 more good years.
This is the kind of actuarial crap that makes me want to scream! It horrifies me to think that septuagenarians will take this as the expectable norm. it reinforces the expectation that when you reach older age sexual pleasure dwindles. Do not buy this garbage, slow is not stop; reproducible scientific data shows that if you’re healthy enough to have a sexual fantasy, then the more you indulge them the healthier you are, and the healthier you will remain.
The NSLHAP defines sexual activity as “any mutually voluntary activity with another person that involves sexual contact, whether on not intercourse orgasm occurs”. If sexual activity is any contact with another person it means that if you can touch another person intimately you are sexually active; it has nothing to do with getting it up, getting it on or getting it off. It’s about reaching out and touching someone, stroking someone, cuddling, kissing, those connections will keep you healthy.
Seventy year old men look at women sexually (so do eighty and ninety year olds), and women in their seventies look at men as well; my wife still looks at George Clooney and Denzel Washington hungrily> She and friends appreciate an assortment of bodies and baskets, and talks about it openly.
This idea that when you reach old age your sexual pleasure dwindles, is bullshit; as a matter of fact you appreciate it more. Find somebody to love, and when you are with that person, feel the excitement of that special connection in every cell of your body. And in the afterglow, say thank you for making me alive.
As long as you can feel and imagine it, you can find somebody to love; so I’m calling out to old people, reach out and touch someone, that feeling never ends and it’ll keep you healthier. Or in the words of the immortal Yogi Berra, “it ain’t over till it’s over”…(and when it is I’d like to take my last breath snuggled between my love’s breasts).