I have written about my persona as the Truth Fairy (Schlagbyte Archives 7/17/05; 7/24/06; 7/20/10), a magical character who makes an annual appearance at the Oregon Country Fair. The Truth Fairy is a 6’6″ ballerina who wears a pink wig, leotard and tutu and answers peoples most serious questions; the kind you’re afraid to ask because you’re not sure you want to hear the answers.

The Truth Fairy’s entry into the fairgrounds is heralded by a small ensemble called the Blueberries. They tell the audience that they can have the extraordinary opportunity of spending 3″ with the Truth Fairy and ask him a question, something they’ve been thinking about but been afraid to ask because they don’t want to hear the answer. They get to do it privately inside a roped off enclosure and even though it’s not a very long time they often find out something they need to know.

I love this opportunity to channel my intuitive soul and let my spontaneity flow. People will ask this clown some personal questions (sometimes cleverly disguised). For example, a young man, maybe in his late 20s, asked me to reveal his future. I said, I’m not a fortune teller, I am the Truth Fairy, and went on to tell him that I sensed what he wanted to ask had more to do with an issue he was dealing with right now. He nodded and said that he was with a woman and was thinking he might like to spend more time with her, but his history with women was always short-term relationships. He like to stay with her a while, but was afraid that if he stayed she might interpret his decision as readiness for a long-term commitment.

The Truth Fairy told him, if you have to know it before you do it you’ll only do what you’ve already done. Spending too much time preparing for the future makes it hard to appreciate the present. And did you ever think she may not want to be with you long term either?

He wanted to talk more, but his three minutes was up. He tried to get back into line but the Blueberries told him it’s only 3″ with the Truth Fairy but you can think about it much longer.

A 10-year-old girl, with a flower painted on her cheek asked this serious question. “What does whale poop look like?”. The Truth Fairy said, Great Question! and broke out into a Cole Porter tune… birds do it, bees do it, even educated fleas do it, you do it, I do it, everybody poops. This was followed by a spontaneous rendition… it could be big… and a lot… it could be small like a dot… it may be smelly, maybe not, but it’s always good to poop.

Then the Truth Fairy leaned forward and whispered in her ear, when whale’s poop it’s a lot but it floats away on the spot. The most important thing to know about poop is that you never want to keep it locked inside, keeping it in will hurt you. The Truth Fairy loves you.